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Beliefs – Getting to the Root of the Problem

Beliefs are what we feel certain about, be they true or not. Beliefs make us comfortable because they justify our actions. You can understand a person’s beliefs by observing their actions. A thief believes stealing is OK. A husband who works 14 hours a day believes work is more important than family. So, you can ask yourself, what must I believe about women to act the way I do towards them?

“O best of the Bhāratas, now please hear from Me about the three kinds of happiness by which the conditioned soul enjoys, and by which he sometimes comes to the end of all distress.
That which in the beginning may be just like poison but at the end is just like nectar and which awakens one to self-realization is said to be happiness in the mode of goodness.”
– Bg. 18.36-37

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery;’ but I tell you that everyone who gazes at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart
– Matthew 5:27-28

“For all that is in this world the lust up the flesh and the lust of the eyes and the books full pride of life, is not from the father, but is from the world.”
– 1 John 2: 16

 

Exercise

  1. What are your beliefs about women, and how do they affect you?
  2. Determine which of those beliefs are helping you, and which are hurting you, and write them down in two columns – helpful and hurtful.
  3. Replace hurtful beliefs with helpful or empowering beliefs
  4. Write affirmations from your helpful beliefs
  5. Practice acting on those beliefs i.e., as if those were your new beliefs

Here are examples of affirmations:

  • I treat women with respect
  • I see women as servants of Kṛṣṇa
  • I relate to women as mother and honor the motherly nature in women
  • I see myself as a servant of women
  • I am kind to women
  • I see women as self-respecting, valuable human beings
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